Facebook and Twitter and checking your newsfeed
Miley and 1D and feeling your ears bleed
Iced frappes and thigh gaps and tight-fitting leggings
Gym sessions don’t count if you didn’t check in
Untagging, retweeting and following back
Hashtag “nofilter,” did you Instagram that?
Beyoncé and Ugg boots and Marilyn quotes
“This is amazeballs!” “Yeah, babe, TOTES!”
Liking and commenting and scrolling endlessly
Swiping through updates and stories senselessly
Keep posting statuses about how drunk you were last night.
Keep posting tweets about clean eating and egg whites.
Keep posting photos of your name spelled wrong at Starbucks.
But please, keep in mind – nobody gives two fucks.